10 steps to being a rapper:
1
By CenterCore
Step 1: Come up with some ridiculous stage name, like "Lil' Blah Blah" or "Young Jumpy" or "Lil' Stumpy" or "Doorknobby" or "Lil' Joey" or "Lil' this, Lil' that, Lil' blah blah blah"; you get the picture.
Step 2: Write unintelligent, useless lyrics about how cool you are, and all these material items you possess, using primitive dialect and wording, particularly "tha" and "dat" and "dis" and spelling words about the same way a 3 year-old would, or worse, even.
Step 3: You gotta be as degrading to women as possible. Call them b!tch3s, h03s, I'm sorry, "h03z", and all the other disgusting terms you can. Make sure they come across as sexual objects, not people, otherwise your so-called "music" won't sell.
Step 4: Look as ridiculous as you can. Buy all the gold jewelry and cars and houses you can once your stupid "music" starts selling. That's right, blow all your money on trash, then brag about being "tHa BeSt".
Step 5: "Diss" other rappers. I mean, come on! What rapper doesn't like to put other equally talentless hacks down just to make themself feel even better about their nonexistent talent? It's part of the process!
Step 6: Make a few songs with some kind of intelligent lyrics to them, just for good measure, so that one or two people might think you're "deep".
Step 7: Flaunt yourself as some sort of "hardcore gangster (I'm sorry, gangSTA)" and that'll give you "street cred".
Step 8: Keep on degrading women, buying fancy new crap, and looking even more ridiculous.
Step 9: Constantly throw up all sorts of stupid hand signs and identify yourself with whichever "SIIIIIDE!!!!" you're from.
Step 10: Enjoy your 15 minutes of fame!
